So it is now 4:17 a.m. here and I am still awake. Babies really change your sleep patterns. I use to be a real sleep champion (if I do say so myself). I could sleep for 16 hours in a row. I wouldn't wake up to use the washroom, I wouldn't wake up if the house was on fire, I wouldn't wake up with a good shaking...nothing could wake me. My mom said when I was a teenager she would go into my room to check if I was breathing because I had been asleep so long. After my daughter was born that all changed and now at best I nap. I can't sleep longer than 3 hours in a row. Don't get me wrong I am always tired and often look and operate like the walking dead but I just can't sleep. Of all the pre-motherhood things I miss I think I miss sleep the most (my figure comes in a close second LOL).
Right now I should by all means be asleep...everyone else is so I have no good reason to still be awake. I think I am in a perpetual state of being too tired to sleep. You know when you get to the point of exhaustion where you are shaking with nervous energy? Well that describes me in a nutshell over the last almost three years now.
So what do I do when I am awake at ungodly hours? I work...you know you are grownup when that is what you willingly do in your spare time. I clean (O.C.D. style), I roll my business around in my head like a tumbleweed, I search for pretty things on net, and I take baths...long soapy skin wrinkling baths. I should really go to bed!
I missed my 6week postpartum checkup today. It literally just slipped my mind. Funny how I never forget appointments for the babies or for Craig...I am just that selfless LOL
That is a milestone though the 6week appointment. Essentially what it means is I have no more excuses to not workout. I was pregnant for literally two years in a row. I have been inactive for so long that I am kinda scared to start up again because I expect too much too soon and as such get discouraged real quick. My body feels so foreign to me these days. Sometimes I catch a glance of myself in the mirror and I feel jarred, I have to look away very quickly. Everyone keeps telling me to be realistic and that it takes time but I could be the spokesperson for the "I want it right now!" generation, mah...
So off to the tub and then for a three hour nap!
Lots of love,
Cat
Right now I should by all means be asleep...everyone else is so I have no good reason to still be awake. I think I am in a perpetual state of being too tired to sleep. You know when you get to the point of exhaustion where you are shaking with nervous energy? Well that describes me in a nutshell over the last almost three years now.
So what do I do when I am awake at ungodly hours? I work...you know you are grownup when that is what you willingly do in your spare time. I clean (O.C.D. style), I roll my business around in my head like a tumbleweed, I search for pretty things on net, and I take baths...long soapy skin wrinkling baths. I should really go to bed!
I missed my 6week postpartum checkup today. It literally just slipped my mind. Funny how I never forget appointments for the babies or for Craig...I am just that selfless LOL
That is a milestone though the 6week appointment. Essentially what it means is I have no more excuses to not workout. I was pregnant for literally two years in a row. I have been inactive for so long that I am kinda scared to start up again because I expect too much too soon and as such get discouraged real quick. My body feels so foreign to me these days. Sometimes I catch a glance of myself in the mirror and I feel jarred, I have to look away very quickly. Everyone keeps telling me to be realistic and that it takes time but I could be the spokesperson for the "I want it right now!" generation, mah...
So off to the tub and then for a three hour nap!
Lots of love,
Cat
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